Rocket's Rules - NEVER BE AFRAID TO TRY NEW FOODS . . . . . .

Have discovered something which is even better than peanut butter. (Hadn't thought it possible.) 'Tis truly Kitty Heaven. He dug some potatoes from the allotment and She washed them before peeling them. Those peelings are Out Of This World. Couldn't control myself and leaped up to Her side and patted the hand that was holding the potato. No response so I pulled the hand with the peeler gently and very carefully towards me. She got the idea and gave me the peeling. Jumped down, ate it apart from a couple of scabby bits which I spat out and pushed out of sight beneath the cupboard. Back up again for another. And another. And another. And now there is quite a pile of discarded bits and I feel distinctly full and slightly uncomfortable. Shall go nest in Their duvet before venturing outside to explore the conservatory roof again.

Rocket's Rules - THERE IS ALWAYS AN ALTERNATIVE WAY

Popped out before breakfast to have another try at the conservatory roof while feeling fresh and not exhausted from the Somersault Game. First attempt I hit the guttering and hung on for a while but couldn't pull myself up, so I descended gracefully and went to try the other end. Sadly I was tired from the previous try and merely hit the window before falling to the ground beneath a plant. They both came running out to see what the noise was so I stayed put where they couldn't see me. Remembered yesterday when They laughed and I didn't want to have to chomp Her ankle again in retribution as it tasted rather nasty.) Thankfully They didn't notice the scrabble marks and hairs on the glass.

Thought long and hard and was about to give up when I realised the garden fence would make access easy. Up to the top of it and then a careful walk to the corner of the roof. (Why do they make fences so thin and tricky to walk along? Am sure it is not dignified with 2 legs on the top and the other 2 on tippy toes where the strut is.)

Reached the roof and went to the top. Found I could now get to the house roof so went to investigate. It was a total surprise to find even more world out front but the magpies were chuttering so I went back down for breakfast. Noticed She has a piece of sticking plaster on Her ankle.

Rocket's Rules - ALWAYS ATTEMPT NEW THINGS IN PRIVATE FIRST

We all went outside and played the Somersault Game (see yesterday) for as long as I could and then They invited me to walk to the other end of My garden. Oooh and WOW. A lovely big pond and lots of hiding places. Shall have to investigate all the possibilities. But not when the magpies are around. My head is still a tad sorely.

On the way back I noticed that the conservatory roof is lower than I had thought so I made a run at it and leaped. And missed. Ouch. Maybe tomorrow I shall try again when They are not watching. Attacked Her ankle with a highly satisfying chomp as She had laughed most immoderately when I missed the conservatory roof.

Rocket's Rules - ALWAYS TRY YOUR HARDEST

After yesterday's contretemps in the conservatory I put on my most winning expression when She finally let me back in the house. Rolled over several times and waved my paws prettily in the air. She was Not Impressed so I somersaulted several times by the cupboard door where They keep my food. That didn't work either as every time I opened it She shut it again so I finally tried chasing my tail in circles. When I could see straight again She had gone. (Mental Note no.1 - This will take time and much thought.)
Luckily He wasn't cross (apart from having to clean the conservatory floor) so I spent the evening on his knees as He watched television.
This morning She was still prickly but He dropped several bits of bacon and peanut butter which was very thoughtful of Him.

We all went into the garden after breakfast and up onto the lawn. The grass tickles my paws but I was on Best Behaviour and didn't complain. He has been chopping down all sorts of things - Calls it pruning but it looks more like a massacre though She is pleased. They picked up most of the bits He had missed and a Wonderful Game ensued. He dragged a long twig across the grass and I chased it. Then He flicked one end in the air and I jumped. It was an excellent somersault although the landing was harder than expected. They both laughed so I continued as long as I could. Think She was pleased at my efforts as She scrubbled my head when I was lying on the ground trying to look dignified and winsome. Extremely difficult when one is gasping for breath.

Rocket's Rules - DON'T OVERESTIMATE YOUR OWN STRENGTH

Oh dear. I suspect I rather overestimated my strength. (Must be all the peanut butter on toast.) Climbing the tall plant by the conservatory door was fine, so was the next one though coming down was a tad tricky, but the third was a spindly variety. (Can't imagine why She keeps such a manky specimen.) I was half way up when it bent and dropped me in the pond water She keeps for the pitcher plants. Unfortunately the bowl was already full with one of said pitcher plants. There was a bit of a splash and the heater went Pop with a flash and funny smell.

I pushed the broken bits of plant and bowl under the sofa and tried to help all the water disappear with delicate paw movements but it left long muddy streaks. When She saw She screamed. I tried to explain it was the fault of the spindly plant but then She saw the big leaves on the second one that had somehow got rather shredded.

How unfair. She pushed me out of the Kitty Flap and LOCKED IT.

Rocket's Rules - NEVER MISS A CHANCE

Hhmm. Not one but TWO magpies in my garden. Come down as soon as He has put out the bird food and dig in the pot to see if there are any scraps of Magpie Food. There never are but they sure make a mess finding out. This morning they were up in an apple tree chuttering away telling Him He was late. (Which He was as We all had a lie in. His ankles make a great pillow and I anchored myself to the duvet above her knees in case I slipped.) What with those two AND the crows which circle the chicken pen like dirty black handkerchiefs in the wind AND the blackbirds AND the sparrows AND the robins (miserable little things. Forever fighting) AND the pigeons AND the blue tits AND I don't know the names of any of the others, my garden is a No-Go area until long after breakfast.

Today She had forgotten to shut the door to the conservatory so I snuck in and sat on the windowsill ready to curl my lip at any trespasser who happened to glance my way. When they all went I had a lovely snooze and am now ready and willing to climb all the tall plants again. Shall commence with the one that is closest to the door in case I have to make a hasty exit.

Rocket's Rules - MAKE SURE TO WIPE PAWS ON COMING BACK IN

Have had a very sorely head for the past few days thanks to the magpie who bopped it very hard. Add to that the weather which has been cold and wet and it should have been no surprise to Them that I didn't want to go out. But They insisted - (Could it have had something to do with the fact that grabbing ankles as They pass helps me forget 'the call of nature'? Sadly She dropped the mugs of tea She was carrying this morning. Why can't She look where She is going?) - and pushed my face hard against the Kitty Door whilst helping the other end through in no uncertain terms.

I made sure when I returned that my paws were extremely muddy and nested on the chaise longue. Apparently velvet is remarkably hard to clean.
Good.

Rocket's Rules - KEEP OUT OF THE WAY OF MAGPIES

They had roast chicken for dinner last night. It comes a very close second to peanut butter. Don't think She was entirely happy though when She found I had washed up the gravy saucepan She left on the cooker.

Ventured nonchalantly up the stone steps this morning in case the birds were watching. Very odd - None there. Was wondering why not when I was hit on the head by a screeching magpie which explained their absence from the garden. And mine.

Helped Her empty the washing machine. Everything is gloriously hot when it comes out so I nested on the pile to keep it nice and tidy.

Rocket's Rules - KEEP YOUR BAUBELS UNDER CONTROL

Very thoughtful of Them - They unlock my Kitty Door as She makes our breakfast. Took a short constitutional around my domain and then the aroma of bacon and peanut butter drew me back inside, sadly before I had the chance to investigate what was Going On up the stone steps. Chopped bacon and peanut butter on toast (I HATE toast) made an excellent start to my day.

He and I went into the living room to play Bop the Bauble. He rolled it, I bopped it and He rolled it and I bopped it and He . . . . A Good Game but one that didn't last as He overbalanced trying to reach my Christmas bauble and shattered it with a loud popping sound when He sat down. Both of us hastened upstairs to escape Her.

Rocket's Rules - KEEP GOING UNTIL YOU HAVE SUCCESS

At last! My own plate of peanut butter on toast at breakfast. It took time but we are finally Getting There. (Wonder if it had anything to do with the fact She trod on one of the discarded bits of soggy toast I have been piling neatly beneath the kitchen table? Apparently She wasn't wearing slippers.)

They took forever to eat their breakfast but as They had unlocked my Kitty Door I went out by myself. Had a quick look round my little courtyard and then up the steps. (Carefully in case I slipped again.) It sounded Very Busy in the garden so I paused on the top step and crouched down just in case it was Not Safe. Gradually raised my head until I could just see over the top. Hundreds of birds! All over the place! Hopping, twittering, pecking - They were having breakfast! Aawww. Bless. (Mental Note no.1: They might like to play with me some time.) Sat watching for a while but the stone was decidedly chilly so I came back inside to chase the Christmas bauble in the living room.

Rocket's Rules - DON'T RUN DOWN THE STEPS

He is really getting the hang of the Feeding Thing. I only have to pat Him a couple of times and down floats the peanut butter on toast. 4 pieces this morning. But I so much prefer it without the toast. Left the soggy pieces by yesterday's under the table.

I conducted Them outside this morning. Went through my Kitty Door and then called for Them to join me. Showed Them the pretty blue table and 2 chairs, the conservatory door and then the 5 steps as I thought about climbing to the top. She went up first and He helped from the rear - My rear. Very Big out there it is, but to keep Them happy I took a step or two onto the lawn. It tickled! My delicate little paws were tickled. Jumped up and down a few times and then ran back down the steps. Sadly missed my footing and wrapped myself around the leg of the pretty blue table. She laughed so I swotted Her hard as She walked by.

Rocket's Rules - NEVER OVERDO NEW EXPERIENCES

Joy! Joy Unlimited!! He remembered the peanut butter on toast for my breakfast. Would be better without the toast but I can easily lick it off. Left the 3 slightly damp pieces of toast neatly beneath the kitchen table.

We all went outside again after breakfast after He had unlocked the Kitty Door. Thankfully I remembered to get through it very quickly. (My tail is still a tad sore.) Today I wandered a little further and discovered the other side of the conservatory where I had such fun climbing the plants before They locked me out. Stood up and had a good look through the windows and door. The orchid that jumped to the floor still looks rather bent. (Mental Note no.1: Find out if I can open this door with the Somersaulting Method.) There are 5 stone steps leading up from the little courtyard. I went up to have a look and there was a Big World up there. Huge. Enormous. And Full of I Know Not What. A nasty wind was blowing so I saved it for another day.

Rocket's Rules - IF YOU DON'T ASK YOU DON'T GET

Breakfast was Truly Superb. It started off very badly as He found She hadn't bought any Marmite because He hadn't put it on the shopping list so He got the peanut butter out of the cupboard. Oh the aroma! Oh the glorious, mouth watering smell! Never ever had I imagined anything so Utterly Heavenly. I thought of getting up on the table to talk to Him about it but remembered the last time so I patted Him on the ankle. It took several pats and one big both-paw-grab but He finally got the message and a small piece of toast floated down. Total Bliss.
(Mental Note no.1: She put the jar back in my cupboard.)

My Kitty Door was opened with great ceremony and I was invited outside. Didn't move quite fast enough though and the door pinched my tail most horribly. When I regained my composure I found a small courtyard, a pretty blue table and 2 chairs and assorted big plants. (Mental Note no.2: Remember those plants.) Looked around hoping for more peanut butter but there wasn't any so went back inside to chase the Christmas tree bauble I found beneath the sofa yesterday.

Rocket's Rules - PRACTICE MAKES PERFECT

Apparently the kitchen cupboard where She keeps her Best Table Linen was flooded by the goldfish yesterday so She was Not Pleased with them. This morning I noticed all but one of the fish swimming around in a cut glass salad bowl  but when I went to have a closer look I was escorted out of the kitchen and the was shut. Sadly, not a door I could open with my somersaulting manoeuvre. Then They went out and bought a new fish tank which is sturdier and heavier than the one that jumped off the window sill.

The Kitty Window is indeed a door. Just for Me. (They simply hadn't read the instructions and it was locked.) I spent a long and happy time going in and out as fast as I could until They locked it again. Not sure why.

Rocket's Rules - GET OUT FAST IF IT GOES WRONG

I had really had enough of having my Delicate Nose pushed hard against the Kitty Window so I went off to watch the goldfish on the windowsill. They however stayed by the kitchen door. If I overheard correctly the little window should open so I can get into the garden, but it doesn't. (I could have told Them that.) After She had tried too, several times, She went outside and crouched down. They got more and more irritated but whether with the Kitty Window or Each Other I couldn't tell. It was better than watching the goldfish though so I turned around. Sadly too fast and my paws slipped on the far too narrow and highly polished surface. Although I tried hard to keep a hold of the fish bowl it jumped off onto the kitchen unit.

It seemed a good idea to go elsewhere so I raced upstairs and after wiping my paws on the duvet , nested beneath it for a snooze.

Rocket's Rules - DON'T TRUST DOORS

Hhmm. Not sure about Doors. Some are fine but others are Not.

For a start I was Totally Misled by the cupboard door where They keep my food. It opens easily when I somersault at it, but yesterday it fell off its hinges and landed most painfully on that area I call My Dignity.

And the fridge doors - The wooden one is fine but I cannot get the inner white one to open and to be constantly hitting it with a powerful somersaulting motion is becoming painful.

The back door now has a see-thru' window in it at kitty height. Very kind of Them but I much prefer sitting on the windowsill at bird height. They keep insisting I sit by Theirs though and are constantly pushing my face against it. Why ??

Rocket's Rules - I NEED TO WATCH CLOSELY

Much hammering and sawing at the back door this morning but then He hit His thumb with the hammer and said something Extremely Rude. She was very sympathetic so I strolled over to help and patted His hand. And was repulsed. Most forcibly. There you go - Some people simply cannot cope with even a small amount of pain. Mental Note to go check on what He was doing later.

The somersaulting to open the cupboard door where They keep my food works wonderfully well. Cannot say the same for the fridge however: The wooden door is no problem but the white door behind it is proving impossible. Another Mental Note that I must keep a close watch and see how They get it open.

Rocket's Rules - THINK OUTSIDE THE BOX OR IN THIS CASE, CUPBOARD

Have been gently mulling over this Problem of Not Getting Enough Food. Asking politely or even bellowing doesn't work as They simply Do Not Understand.
Grabbing a passing ankle is more painful than productive. For Me that is.
And then last night I had a KBW (Kitty Brain Wave) - Open the cupboard door! Tried it this morning after my one packet of food and the Marmite on toast. Somersaulted towards the cupboard door and a back paw got hooked beneath it, pulling it open. I sat up and looked cute and hungry and opened my pink mouth hopefully with a front paw raised in what I hoped was a pathetic and winning way. IT WORKED!! Life is definitely on the up food-wise.

Much of the snow has gone and I overheard Them discussing whether it was time to let me out. Had I been staying with Them long enough not to run away?  
Run away? When I have just started to make myself understood as regards food? They've gotta be joking.

Rocket's Rules - IF AT FIRST

When They were out yesterday I discovered how to open some of the doors. Took me a long time but I found that if I hurl myself in a somersault at the tiny gap some part of me generally pulls it open as I come down to earth. When we all got up for breakfast this morning I found it also works on the cupboard door where They keep my food. Most satisfying. As a reward I received Marmite on toast. (Mental note to keep honing my skills at door opening as They seem to understand I need food when I do it.)

The world is white! Stood on the kitchen windowsill to look. Not too close to the glass though because it was very cold on my nose. The whole outside is covered with snow and lots of small birds are eating from the feeder. If only I could get out. I curled my lip at them but they took no notice. (Wonder if I can open the back door. . . .)

Gave up on the back door when I landed on one of his boots and They laughed. Went into the next room and sat over the radiator and watched the snow coming down. Invented a Game of patting at the snow flakes while standing on my back legs until I slipped.

Rocket's Rules - IF SAYING SORRY DOESN'T WORK LOOK CUTE

Oh boy oh boy oh boy were They cross yesterday. Didn't want play, not even the Hem Of Her Skirt Game or Chase The Toes Under The Duvet.

Still annoyed this morning and I was not allowed to help Her in the bathroom even though I sat outside the door and apologised as loudly as I could. She finally opened it and I thought She had relented but She tripped and inadvertently threw a mug of water on me. Went and dried myself on the duvet before playing Bouncy Bouncy on Him who was snoozing.

Raced Her down the stairs and asked (politely) for breakfast. It finally arrived but NO MARMITE on toast and no head scrubbling. More apologising produced no effect so I rolled onto my back and looked cute. It didn't work so I lay across Her slippers waving a paw and smiling up at Her even more cutely as She ate. Hopefully. Just as I was about to give up, a piece of bacon sailed through the air towards me. Yummy (but not as good as Marmite.) So I patted Her ankle and another piece flew down. A third pat produced yet more. Tried patting His ankle too but He'd already eaten His. Thought of leaping out and grabbing His foot as He got up but had second thoughts remembering the previous occasion. (He is remarkably clumsy.)

After breakfast They went shopping. Slightly later than intended as we were playing Hide In The Bag And Grab The Fingers As They Go To Pick Up The Bag. A most successful and entertaining Game.
As They left They made sure the conservatory door was locked.

Rocket's Rules - DO NOT GO OUT AND LEAVE ME SHUT IN THE CONSERVATORY

A wonderful night's sleep with the occasional Game to keep Them happy. She wiggles her toes as an invitation that cannot be refused. Chasing them beneath the duvet is fun but difficult.

I tried so hard to go and help Him when He went out with the pot this morning but She held me back. Not through thoughtlessness I am sure but because She wanted to play that Game with the hem of Her skirt. Bumped my head rather painfully on the leg of a kitchen chair when She turned suddenly.

After breakfast we all went to tidy the conservatory. Hadn't been in here before - It's warm and full of big plants for climbing. When They had moved some things around They went back to the kitchen. And FORGOT me. I shouted and shouted but They didn't hear and then went out in the car.
It grew very boring investigating what was in there. (Shame about the orchids that fell off the table.) Patted a leaf They had missed but it caught on a claw and bumped into the jug of water when I shook it off. Then I discovered one of the pots had lots of tiny stones in it. Hooked out a few with a delicate paw and chased them around. Great fun though the floor was rather wet and slippery and it was painful when I trod on the pebbles so I tried climbing some of the big plants instead. FUN!! The one with enormous leaves was the best - when I least expected it they bent and I slid off even though I grabbed hold with all 4 paws. (Luckily the leaves already had holes in them so it didn't show too much.) Wiped my muddy paws carefully on one end of the sofa before I had a snooze and was considering climbing some of the smaller plants when They arrived home.

Why were They so cross?